Monday 29 August 2016

Some Reformation: Joe heads to NC

"Just yesterday morning (August 25), after months of prayerful deliberation, the GCI Board met, concluding that we should proceed to implement plans to relocate the Home Office to a yet-to-be-determined location in North Carolina."
Joe Tkach Jr

So the Tkach sect is uprooting again. Oregon (in early Herbal days), Pasadena, Glendora and now an undisclosed location in North Carolina.

Yet-to-be-determined? I don't believe a word of it. Months of prayerful deliberation? You mean back room plotting?

The question is, why the move?

Of course, Joe has an explanation.

"Southern California has served us well, yet over time the cost of living has reached the point where consideration has to be given to relocating."

Cost of living?

"A major consideration for relocation is that we can cut our overhead (i.e., cost of doing business in California) by $500,000 per year. While this may seem reason enough to move out of California, there are other advantages. Our Glendora church property has significantly increased in value; by relocating, we would access some of that accrued equity to go directly into our mission of the gospel proclamation... Another significant factor to consider in relocation is 65% of our congregations are in the eastern half of the continental US... Our management team has been searching for an area with good quality of life and access to more affordable housing for our employees."

Sounds a lot like the reason the Meredith sect gave for relocating to Charlotte. The old boys wanted a nice lifestyle with a nice climate to see them out. Everything else, one suspects, was justification after the fact. Beneath all the PR bullgeschichte that Joe burbles, it'd put good money on similar factors being in play this time too. Could it be that, in the process, Joe can dump some unwanted baggage and set himself up for an even nicer sinecure of a retirement?

"... more affordable housing for our employees"? Really. How many of these lucky employees will have to stay behind in LA to keep close to family? Tough break. Those who own homes in the area? Did they get a vote? Let's not be silly, this is all about Joe & Co. getting their way and devil take the hindmost.

North Carolina is where Armstrong sects go to wither and die. The Ritenbaugh sect (Church of the Great God, Charlotte), the Meredith sect (LCG, Charlotte). Do you think Joe might have (hush, hush sweet) Charlotte in mind too? The possibilities are intriguing; imagine Wednesday night beer and poker with Joe, Richard and Gerry!

Think back to the name change to GCI. Joey had it all prearranged, then they decided to pull a soft PR stunt and take member suggestions into consideration. How thoughtful and consultative. When the dust settled, they still went with a variant of Joe's first choice. Surprise!

Final thought. PG Joe writes about his Board. He gives cute little bios of the members. The one thing he doesn't explain is how these individuals ended up on the board. Elected were they Joe? Or perhaps they were appointed from on high, the angel Moroni descending with the names inscribed on holy scrolls. No, not so likely. Appointed, yes; from on high, yes. On high being Joe's big boy chair in his soon to be relocated office.

Sounds like a Board accountable not to the church, not to the members, but to... guess who? Was there ever any possibility that voices on that board would be raised in opposition to their lord and master?

Some reformation.


Unknown said...

I just spoke with Andy, Barney, Goober and Aunt Bea and others on the phone (I think Sarah the operator was listening in too!).

They told me in NO uncertain terms, that they do not want the criminal Tkach gang coming to Mayberry North Carolina any time soon. They love their peaceful and nostalgic town just fine, and do not want their town disturbed with the remnants of a sick hierarchal cult. Otis the drunk, although curious about having new drinking buddies, had a terrible time though in pronouncing the name Tkach.

Anonymous said...

Since when is North Carolina a desirable destination? I've been there - the Research Triangle Park area - one of the better areas. And I know people who have lived there. Hot, humid, tick infested and a culture of bigotry, especially against yankee outsiders. Not that different from Big Sandy - the armpit of the world. Give me southern California anytime.

I will grant you that denominations are fond of saying God directed them in their decisions when it is more likely that the decisions were pragmatic rather than inspired.

As for the board members, who should they be? Who would be the voting populaton? The general membership of GCI? Should there be the travesty like our current national elections carried out in GCI?

I was in the same congregation as Franklin Guice. He and a Mexican member were the logical candidates for Spokemans Club Officers - the only two near graduation - both good speakers. They were passed over. After all, it would be unseemly for two Gentiles to have leadership of Israelites. So a local elder was appointed to be the President that year. I don't think there was a VP. It was back in the Seventies. Guice has been in the crucible.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's to be near The Great Dismal Swamp -- it's an attraction which should appeal to the depressive mood of former WCGers (now turned GCI). South Mills would be perfect.

As we all know, Joseph Tkach is tired and wants to retire, so it may not be his choice really, although he could retire nicely on that half million.

I've been to The Great Dismal Swamp. It doesn't really live up to its name, but the cafes in the area have dense greasy heart attack candidate comfort food, so if my experience is any sort of indicator, it's a great place to die -- or at least be near death in short order with the application of skills brought by short order cooks.

And who knows? Maybe there are some poisonous snakes, plants and insects which could help hasten an uncomfortable death.

Hot, humid, tick infested. A sure-fire formula for chronic misery for the end of life scenarios.

And on the cheap, too.

Great choice for a cult homequarters.

The Skeptic said...

Joe Jr. hit life's lottery. He was working as a foreman in Chicago when HWA died and named Joe Sr. Pastor General. Next thing you know, Joe Jr. is an evangelist and the no. 3 man in the church - then no. 2 - then Joe Sr. died and he was no. 1. From foreman to undisputed head of a church! Neat trick!

Life isn't fair. Joe got lucky in middle age, milked a dying church dry of assets and funds, and now his final act will be to set himself up with a comfortable retirement. C'est la vie.