Journal in post

The latest issue of The Journal is now out. You can, as usual, download the front and back pages without charge. There's a nice story about a young feast-goer's act of heroism, an interview with Ray Wooten of United Christian Ministries, and the usual mixed bag of contributions. Lenny Cacchio wants us to quit trying to beat any swords into plowshares - it's hopeless, so sit down on your fat half-acre and wait for the LORD (presumably he doesn't want you to hold your breath.) Ewin Barnett doesn't think government assistance is okay...

Something is wrong because, in almost 40 years of attending church, I have never once heard any discussion of the free-market economic principles that are plainly visible in the teachings of Jesus, such as the parable about the workers in the vineyard (Matthew 20) or even in Proverbs 31.

I don’t know the whole answer to this problem, but I do know enough of sound economics (not the Keynesian counterfeit) to offer my help.

Well, hey, thanks for that generous offer Ewin, but I think I'll pass on that one. On the other hand Wesley White makes some thoughtful comments about the fractious hyper-independent fellowships.

Scattered individuals and small local churches need to develop more relationships with others so they can move away from being hug-me churches in protective bubbles.

Makes sense to me, but I can't see much chance of reversing the process, given the horrendous hierarchic abuse that sent us all zinging away in the series of Big Bangs that shattered the Armstrong Empire beyond recovery.

If you are interested (fascinated, appalled, whatever...) by the continuing journey of COGdom in a post-WCG world, The Journal remains essential reading. Subscription details are here.

Borg Alert! New Cube Over Edmond

Oh joy, another COGlet...

LCG and UCG can relax - at least for the moment - this time it's Gerry Flurry, imperious leader of the Philadelphia Church of God, and Robert Ardis, one of PCG's more colorful defectors, who are facing a Borg challenge. Frank Borg, to be specific. Exactly why the new splinter - Faithful Church of God in Laodicea - split off from the collective is hard to say, but it seems to be a fairly recent peeling away, perhaps just a few weeks prior to this year's Feast of Tabernacles. The new sect's two booklets (both by Frank) are dated 2009, and the website still seems to be a work in progress.

There are some who might say that Borg is an apt moniker for sects like PCG and Ardis' CGF, and the image of Gerry as "Borg Queen" does have a certain undeniable attraction. Here's Borg's take on the latest COG hemorrhage:

By 1997, it began to transpire that Mr. Flurry’s focus and commission had changed to again deliver the gospel message to the World – a commission that had already been completed by Mr. Armstrong (Matt. 24:14). Around this time God raised up another man, Mr. Robert Ardis, as leader of the Church of God’s Faithful (CGF) to head His Laodicean Work. God used Mr. Ardis to reveal a number of Truths including the deepening in understanding of the meaning of God’s Holy Days, and other vital teachings such as the fact that the Day of the Lord and the Day of the Lord’s Wrath are two separate events. To date, no other group has accepted these Biblical Truths. It became evident that, with Mr. Ardis as leader, the Laodicean candlestick was ignited and blessed with deeper understanding in a number of Biblical areas. However, Mr. Ardis also preached that the Day of the Lord came ‘as a thief in the night’ in October 1997. As time passed, the Laodicean characteristics outlined in Rev. 3:14-22 became increasingly evident in Mr. Ardis’ CGF, including a Laodicean attitude towards the Work of God (vs. 15). Among other things, by mid-August 2009, it became clear that the ‘Day of the Lord’ had not in fact occurred but was erroneously being preached. Biblical evidence proved that this momentous event is now about to occur and that an urgent warning message must go out to God’s people (Joel 1:15; 2:1). This vital information was immediately delivered to Mr. Ardis but was blatantly rejected (Hos. 4:6).

God seems to keep choosing the wrong blokes, regardless of whether their candlesticks are ignited. Maybe he should hire a consultancy firm.

Perhaps it's too much to hope that this group will be more of a thorn in the flesh to Gerry than most other Flurridian split-offs, but it does boast a mailing address in Edmond, OK., right on "that prophet"'s doorstep. Nasty!

Resistance, it seems, may not be futile after all.

Are We All Excited Yet?

Well, you backsliders all should be! The UCG has launched new online Bible study lessons to unlock the mystery to life's crucial questions. This is no mere rumor brethren, I've read the press release!

The United Church of God has a mission, which is to announce to the world the teachings of Jesus Christ. Further, the Church desires to prepare those that receive the gospel for the Kingdom of God. Understanding that many people have difficulty comprehending the true meaning of God’s Word; the Church has gone to great efforts to create bible study lessons that are designed to alleviate any misunderstandings.

The altruism of the Churches of God continually amazes me, and here, as you can see, is a sterling example.

... many people are confused by biblical scripture. Because the United Church of God wants so desperately to assist others with their journey and exploration of the Bible, they not only offer online bible study lessons, but they are provided free of charge.

Yes, you're probably all choked up, just as I am, at the selfless generosity of the lads in Milford. Imagine all those hours poring over volumes in the Hermeneia commentary series, consulting scholars in the leading universities...

What's that you say? They did no such thing? What do you mean, "they winged it."? Pardon me, please explain what you mean by "not new"? The press release says NEW. Hang on, let's check the PDF of lesson 1, after all they'd hardly put out a November 2009 press release to promote something with a copyright date of 1997 now would they!

Oops.

Well, the proof is in the pudding, so to speak, even if it is a very stale pudding indeed, so you can check out the value of these fine "new" lessons for yourself (if haven't already, long ago) by clicking over to http://www.ucg.org/bible-study/bible-study-lessons.htm. Who knows, you might learn something profound and life changing, unlocking those crucial questions the PR refers to. On the other hand, maybe it's the usual manipulative drivel. That'd certainly be my opinion, having had a look at some of these not-so-new "new" lessons years ago. But top marks to Team Milford for putting PR lipstick on a very old porker without batting an eyelid.

There is something new in the wind though. Brace yourself for wonderful really-new study guides from UCG. These are apparently new, so new that so far you can only access a sample lesson, and the details are over on Mike Bennett's blog. In fact Mike seems to be one of the shakers and movers on this project. I'm not sure what Mike's qualifications are for such a demanding task, but maybe he has the complete set of Hermeneia volumes...

Our team of dedicated writers has already written 45 lessons on everything from the armor of God to dealing with unemployment, and we are eagerly waiting to get them up on the Web!

Well, no, maybe not.

Stop it Bob, you'll go blind!

Prognostication takes another turn into the land of the crazy with the stunningly brain-dead nonsense COGaholics are spouting forth about the EU leadership.

Do none of these self-declared experts remember the fiasco about Franz Joseph Strauss?

Simple answer: yes, but they're humming loudly to themselves and pretending they don't.

So along comes Herman Van Rompuy, and the screaming doom-casters, having learned nothing, are at it again.

Bob Thiel, Th.D (Kochi, India) has this to say on his blog.

Herman Van Rompuy has pledged to raise taxes. And since he is not the final King of the North, if Daniel 11:20 has a final fulfillment and he dies early, the following may apply to him:

There shall arise in his place one who imposes taxes on the glorious kingdom; but within a few days he shall be destroyed, but not in anger or in battle (Daniel 11:20).

You're wading way out into the quicksand there Bob.

... I believe that while Herman Van Rompuy is not likely to be the one that is the final King of the North, he may help set the stage for that leader to rise up. And if he fulfills his comments about raising taxes, he certainly could be considered as a person who fulfills Daniel 11:20.

The hilarious thing is that Bob is posturing as the cautious commentator vis-à-vis the truckload of manure that the Flurry sect is spouting on this issue. He doesn't seem to have succeeded!

Let's be honest. Franz Joseph Strauss had zero prophetic significance. That's obvious in hindsight, but it was also obvious at the time to anybody who bothered to look into the genre of biblical writing.

Herman Van Rompuy has zero prophetic significance. You don't need to wait to find that out, it's completely obvious right now.

Daniel 11:20 has nothing to do with Herman Van Rompuy. Does Bob (or Gerry) not possess a decent commentary to refer to? (Possibly not, as they'd consider such a thing "worldly.")

Herbert Armstrong and his "hanger-onners" had zero prophetic insight.

Gerry Flurry's prophetic insight scores in negative numbers. Zero flatters him.

Bob Thiel has zero prophetic insight.

This is where all the nonsense about "watch world news" falls apart. The Bible can't be aligned with the newspaper headlines of today (or Time cover articles), any more than it could in the 1930s or 1970s. The whole enterprise is doomed to failure, although a convincing performance may line the pockets of those who claim otherwise.

It may cause folk to feel special if they delude themselves about having an inside-track on world events, but sooner or later they - and often their loved ones - are going to have to pay.

Across on Mike Bennett's blog is one of those gratuitous postings on the perils of taking the Lord's name in vain. It's called "Signs of perilous times: blasphemers." Here's the irony: the very same people who are horrified by gosh or darn seem deliriously happy when someone climbs up into the pulpit and talks utter rubbish in God's name, claiming - on God's authority - to identify prophetic significance where there is absolutely none. Again, think of all that inane speculation about Strauss and Otto von Habsburg.

Now that really is taking God's name in vain.

Mormon dissent and the Tkach sect

It is remarkable just how much prominence the WCG/GCI transformation has in dissident Mormon circles. Particularly among LDS with evangelical leanings, the changes under Tkach have been inspirational. Here's a recent example. Joe himself has been hauled out as exhibit A in Utah by his evangelical buddies, and the Called to be Free video - a hagiography of Joe & Co. - was produced by a post-Mormon group. The parallels between the two movements (LDS and old WCG) included the God Family and Lost Tribes teachings. If you run across a former LDS who thinks the WCG story is the best thing since sliced bread, do set them straight.

But all that glitters is not gold, and the WCG paradigm is probably not the one to emulate.

(The Called to be Free video is available to view in full online.)

Afflictions of the Righteous

Poor Mister Weinland. Such trials and tribulations! His poor, dear sainted wife Laura - such a cross (er, um, stake) to bear, what with those nasty IRS people sniffing around. Swiss bank accounts you say? This just proves that God's chosen servant is being provident! And now the Prophet/Apostle's daughter, the lovely Audra Little, is caught up in the agony (also here). I'm feeling teary-eyed at the very thought of this terrible injustice. But be thou comforted Audra, many are the afflictions of the righteous. And fear not brethren, they'll never convict Mister Weinland because the Great Tribulation begins in 2008 and...

Oh, wait... hmm.

But never mind, here at AW we're happy to express our unqualified support for the holy martyrs (Ron, Laura and Audra) - tastefully conveying our best wishes via this image of an IRS pencil sharpener. Hopefully Ron will, um, get the point.