Tuesday 31 July 2007

July 31

Yes brethren, it's the last day of July and no more sleeps to go. After weeks of anticipation we can all finally yell out...


The apostle was born in Old Des Moines today in 1892. Fireworks and revelry began at midnight as millions poured out of cities like New Auckland and Lomaville (formerly Sydney) to pay homage to God's Right Hand Man, who has just returned from his 33rd Universe-wide junket visiting alien government heads in Andromeda on behalf of the Government of God. The biggest celebrations have yet to commence when the first rays of the sun strike the New Temple in Armstrong City (formerly Jerusalem) in a few hours time. Since He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named returned in glory in 1975 the world has been transformed into a true Garden of Eden, and we are all very, very grateful. Just yesterday the resurrected Richard "Dick" Armstrong placed the final shovel full of soil - removed in 1982 from the summit of Mount Everest - into what had been the Atlantic Ocean. Prophecy is being fulfilled before our eyes!

Not even the rebellion of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named can dampen the thrill of this year's Herbalmass; after all, we're all aware of other sons who went wrong. Exactly where HWMNBN will establish his new rebel headquarters is as yet unknown, but Herbert W. Armstrong, now promoted to fill his executive role, has ruled out a possible location in the Sides of the North. Roderick C. Meredith, now number 3 following the defection of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, is quoted in The Happier, Bestest Ever News as saying: "let him camp out in the Dog Star."

Meanwhile "Kscribe" has released his annual birthday bash tribute to the Mighty One at, please report any family members who fail to view it to the local enforcement office in your area.


Anonymous said...
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Russell Miller said...

That was perfect!

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday to Herb:

Cancel my "subscription to the resurrection" Herby, you old fool! Better the lake of fire than an eternity with gullible fools like your "DUMB MIND NUMB SHEEP" and a mental midget Charlatan like yourself!! You hateful, judgmental, incestuous CHILD MOLESTING sexual deviate, that exploited others for a monetary profit, all for the glory of your selfish ego driven pride! Eat Shit and die again (if that's possible) you decrepted religious fanatic!! Perhaps someone (Tkach Jr) should dig up your bones and burn them on an Pagan Altar to the pleasure of the disemboweled and disgrunted masses of your lifeless Churches of Gauddd....

Anonymous said...

Stop beating around the bush, and tell us how you really feel...

Lussenheide said...

Gavin and all:

And yes, it is true, that the Lussenheide shares HWA's birthday, and in fact, tommorow July 31st, I will be FIFTY...which according to Jubilee theory entitles me to be debt free and free of all my contracts!

Since I was born on July 31,1957 (HWAs 65th birthday and the traditional age for retirement) and which also was HWAs 40th wedding anniversary (He got married on his birthday 1917) is obvious that I am a CHILD OF DESTINY and that I..."THE LUSSENHEIDE" am the rightful successor of the "Apostolic Mantle".

Please send your 1st Tithe, 2nd Tithe, 3rd Tithe, Offerings, Building Fund Contributions, Holy Day Offerings, Y.O.U. contributions , inheritaces and special offerings IN CASH to my "Corporation Sole" in Menifee, CA. USA !


Anonymous said...

Eric said...So, Ken Plechaty is Kscribe huh... I knew a fella by that name in Modesto. Wonder if he's the same<

I knew someone by the same name. He was an athlete and a scholarly type of fellow. Small world? Sometimes, but from Ohio where he is now mayor of my small city. If he is the same I shall post some links.

I did a search of the name and found out he was from a family of athletes, if indeed he is the one listed on my search? But what does it matter. Just give the boy a hand for the video. I made the connection to Armstrong after years in the forsaken cult. Interesting way of expression through video. I guess it is a blog site in a way.

One thing that comes to mind is how do we know who this individual is? I did a search of "who is" and never found a name.

Anonymous said...

From the above subject line I found this at the Painful Truth..
Nov 15, 1998

Dear Wayne,

The purpose of this letter I write today is about your irresponsible if not criminal behavior toward me and others you counseled with concerning membership in the Worldwide Church of God. What am I talking about? After studying several books including "Herbert Armstrong's Tangled Web" and John Tuit's "The Truth Will Set You Free" along with "Ambassador Reports" not to mention some reprints of "News of The World" a British tabloid, along with the "Painful Truth" web site, I wonder how you could never have known of the behavior of hwa!! Further I wonder how you could allow yourself to preach or teach armstronism to anyone, while having knowledge of this mans true character. Hwa is documented as a sexual pervert who committed incest with his own young daughter for a period of 10 years, this fact confirmed by his own family, and was a pathological liar, a thief who misappropriated funds for his own lavish lifestyle and overseas trips. We won't mention how God's apostle made over 400 failed prophesies, and got less than a half a dozen good guesses correct.

Certainly you must have had knowledge of this or did you just close your eyes to it? How could God reveal truths to such a enormously wicked man? Has God fellowship with evil? How could you teach other naive people to follow the teachings of such a man? Do you still believe hwa was a Godly man? If your answer is YES perhaps you should study the subject of brainwashing! If you, however, unconsciously just discarded these facts (that must, of all things, be known to you about hwa) and teach armstrongism, what could your motives be? To earn salvation? I THINK NOT!! Perhaps it is a deep inner desire to have power & rule over other people, hiding the real truth behind a smile and plenty of pious words? This would explain the little tolerance for those who would "think" for themselves and speak openly without fear of excommunication by there leaders. Is this you Wayne? Is this why you taught hwa's TRUTHS? Think about 1 Peter 5:3. The apostles learned from Jesus, fellowshipped with believers, not batter them. As you who has raised sheep must have noticed that battered sheep do not reproduce (that is why armstrong's churches will eventually fail) and do not normally recover from the abuse.

Perhaps if you look at your United Church of God, you will see what happens when you have your "pope" running the show instead of an elected board. I understand that Pontiff David Hume has been recently de-throned, something to do with Lordship over money? Anyway back to the point, corruption and abuse of power will prevail, not caring for the sheep but seeking a quest for power and authority. Hwa's "Quest" magazine a truly perverted piece of garbage, must have given you some insight Wayne! Or how about the civil disobedience when AC went through the receivership. Is this showing obedience to the authorities? Hwa did not care, as the precious tithes were being mailed to his home in Arizona. He was criminal in regards to the receivership!

All in all, hwa never could sue for slander, and never did sue for that. When people wrote books he simply dismissed them as "poppycock". To the braindead at that time in the church, documented proof meant nothing. They followed a man. But if you, yourself, are brainwashed beyond hope, I pity you for not exercising an objective and reasonable mind. Do you lack humility to admit that you knew these things and yet taught this wicked man's doctrines? Paul wrote the Christians of his day "Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them" Eph 5:11-12. For myself I have "Tried them which say they are apostles and are not, but have found them as liars".

So I have written today my expression on this armstrong thing but want you to know that I have not forgotten the good you showed me, and the help I received from you{It was at this point of time I was living in my car. The help I received from this man was a welfare check of cult funds}: Ken and others, I am grateful.

But that does not let you off the hook by any means!! I wasted over $15,000 causing my family great financial difficulties in the past due to my naivete. I hold you partially responsible for this along with "Ozzie" (pastor) for your part in this fraud. So "PAY UP": Lev 6.

Someone who does not forgive I guess. This person should make a video about this guy if one in the same?

        AMERICAN KABUKI said...

Ah, the Armstrong full of answers for questions that should never have been asked about a sane God...who made man and woman and pronounced his creation good...not evil and fearful of their creator.

The Sufi poet Rumi put it well:

You have lost your camel, my friend
And all around you people are full of advice
You don't know where your camel is
But you do know that these casual directions are wrong.

Anonymous said...

A wonderful barf-day tribute to Herbie of the Strong Arm.


Anonymous said...

Shame on Gavin! You went and ticked off the most perfect COGlet member on the face of the earth. You have Thiel in such a snit that he has to stop and defend poor defenseless Herbie. HE is going to make sure that everyone knows that Herbie was the most important man in the 20th century that god worked through.

Anonymous said...

Good Gavin,

I think you have done us all a service!

It IS GOOD to remember that the world today has a much greater awareness of Sabbath and Holy Days as a direct result of the ministry of Herbert W Armstrong.

Thank you HWA :)

Anonymous said...


lilypad said...

I am sorry to hear this, as Leo is my favorite sign! Ugh ugh...